One Week Later...

I have to admit, I actually feel better. I have been exercising again, after a month of hardly any regularity in exercise. I'd do some exercise like once or twice a week. Anyway, I feel better already. I mean, there still are some stuff that really get to me...but I feel like somehow, I had found a bit of balance internally. I wouldn't call it peace exactly, as there are still some things that truly gets to me. But then, for now, I am able to deal with them. Having said that, I hope you guys have happy days too. 

Let the happy days outlive the bad ones. I'll be back...but maybe not in the same light.

Back on Day 20: Long Weekends

I have been gone for a few days, I know. The past week was probably the angriest I have ever been in quite some time. So while I have been searching daily for reasons to be happy, the past week has tremendously twisted my perspectives and realities.

The nice part is that it was a long weekend. I had ample time to recharge myself and restore a semblance of sanity. I have been silent because the I have been blinded by too much anger and hurt to see even the slightest glimmer of joy.

Today seems much better. The reasons to be angry continue to exist, but they no longer play in the foreground of my thought. I see a little more clearly and breath a little more easily. I spent the long weekend spending money that isn't mine--mostly for food and survival. Don't ask me why as it might surface the reasons that are sitting already in the background of thought. I spent the weekend mostly mall hopping and food tripping with my sisters. It was quite fun to be honest.

We finally went ahead and bought a DVD player. We usually watch DVDs on our computer, since it was generally easier for us. But then it would be difficult to watch when other people wanted to watch with us. The computer has such a small screen to accommodate three (3) viewers all at once. It was quite messy to set-up, as our television's really old with a screwed remote control and punched in channel buttons. Yup, you can imagine. Nevertheless, my sister's remote control exploration helped us press the right button. And we got it set up pretty well.

How did you spend your long weekend?

And, what made you happy today?

Day 17: Alanis' Jagged Little Pill

 

Image Source here.

I am actually still very angry. And I don't think it will end any time soon--or at least until I leave this hell of a place. (Yes, I have plans of doing so sometime soon.) There are new reasons to be pissed with every new working day. I have become increasingly anti-social. Because I am a disgruntled employee but I am not permitted to be disgruntled because I am the daughter of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. This is truly driving me insane.

And really, all that's helping me keep quiet at the moment listening to angsty music on earphones. At least I get to release my angst through Alanis' lyrical genius. 

So right now, it's Alanis who's making me happy.

So what made you happy today?

Day 16: Green Tea Latte

 

Image from Starbucks.com

My doctor has forbidden me from taking any coffee, because of the palpitations I have been having. I have been off coffee for about 3 weeks now. After about two weeks, I tried taking a cup of brewed coffee, just the regular 8 oz. cup. An hour later, I had palpitations like crazy. So, no more coffee for me.

The alternative I was given was green tea. Since I was taken off coffee, I have been taking a cup of green tea, twice each day--no more than that. I realize now, more than ever, that anything in excess is indeed bad for your health.

For those of you who might not know, I am a complete coffee addict. I count my coffee intake not in cups or mugs but in jugs. I can consume a jug of coffee in one sitting. My entire family are coffee junkies. Anyone who's ever become close to the family turns into a coffee junkie. 

And then the palpitations started...and then I was off coffee. 

So for now, it's green tea all the way. No regrets though, as I am beginning to like the taste, warmth, and calm that it has brought. 

So what's made you happy today?

Day 15: Blogging

I am absolutely not happy today. To be honest, I went to sleep last night really angry because of something at work. I work for my father's company. Some people might think that because I work for my father's company, I have it easy.

Let me just say this:

1) You do not know my father.

2) You obviously have not worked in what is commonly known as a family business.

My particular environment is quite peculiar. While I am the daughter, I am expected to be the best possible employee, but I am also expected to act like I am just an employee. Yep. There are no special privileges here. We have all the responsibility without the pay nor the praise. We are expected to be the best that every minor error is repugnant enough for you to be called unworthy. The line is the same: "Naturingan ka pa man ding anak ng may-ari." Every mistake, even if its just that you failed to come in a minute earlier, you become the cause of the ultimate demise of the organization.

For someone's sanity, it is truly unhealthy to work for your family business, especially if it is small enough for you to feel that way. I often wish that I just be fired. In that way, I am not abandoning my father. Yes, there is that other angle. They always say that you are just an employee. But the moment you act like any employee would, you become the prodigal child.

They always tell you to separate the professional from the personal--but every mistake you make is taken as a character flaw. 

Note to "family" business owners: Everything is personal. Everything will always be personal. Stop pretending that it is not.

(Sorry for this rant. I am supposed to be finding reasons to be happy everyday. But it gets tiring when things around you are always pushing you down.)

But let me say this: I am happy today that I have this venue to vent. Because I need it. Today, I am happy that I can blog about this.

So what made you happy today?

Day 14: Naggy Grandparents

 

Image Source Here.

My Lola came for a visit and she stayed with us for a few days. She talked non-stop, from the moment she walked in the door, until she left. Apart from while she was sleeping, I never really felt her silence. Nevertheless, she's such a pleasant old lady that you can't think of anything bad about it. She talks a lot, she nags a lot, but then she's also always been quite the caring kind. 

Despite the fact that she doesn't cease to talk, her words are always very gracious. Her tone is always caring. For most things that she nags of, I laugh it off. Some things are quite useful. Some are just really endearing. She's the type of grandparent who is constantly laughing. I hardly see that in old people. After every special nag, she says, "I love you, hija."  Pretty sweet huh?

So what made you happy today?

Day 13: Style and Styling

 

Image Source here.

I have been lemming for this book for over a year. I always miss out on getting it during sale season. I still haven't gotten it yet, but I will, eventually. It is, I think, an absolute must-have if you want to do some styling. 

I have In Style's Getting Gorgeous, which I feel, started my interest in beauty and fashion styling. (Same goes for Trinny & Sussanah...)

I have an ongoing make-over project and I will be using the knowledge I have gained so far. I am in the process of developing the inspiration boards. I've selected the images and all...it's just an issue of bringing it all together now.

So maybe I will make it as a stylist one day? But really, I enjoy doing it, and I would do it for free. Anyone want to give it a shot?

So what made you happy today?

Day 12: Cebu Pacific One Peso Fares

Photo from the Pinoy Travel Blog

Yes. I'd have to give kudos to Cebu Pacific for making travel available to the greater Filipino public. I got myself a round trip ticket to Osaka, Japan for only P1950, including all taxes and travel insurance. On a regular day, the cheapest tickets you can get for Japan are about P15,000, round trip. Woah! Yup, that was exactly my reaction.

Because of Cebu Pacific, I have been able to travel to Singapore and (next year) Japan, with my own, hard-earned money. I don't shop much abroad, since I find that it's cheaper to do shopping here. When I travel, all I really do is walk, and stare at places. Haha.

I am truly, extremely excited for the trip! I've always wanted to go to Japan. And here we are, finally pushing through. The next obstacles are getting the visa, and planning the itinerary. Yoohoo!

So what made you happy today?

Day 11: Sneakers & Rubber Shoes

 

Yep, I like sneakers and these are my purple suede Jack Purcells. I went out yesterday and I was wearing satin flats when it started to rain. I was walking to my destination and my shoes got soaked. I thought to myself, I should have just worn sneakers.

Although my purple suede Jack Purcells are not exactly good for the rain either (suede gets awful when it gets wet), I just felt like I should have worn sneakers. It would have been better. 

So, I stuck it out with my soaked satin flats through a greasy fun yummy dinner. I suppose the next time around I should check out the weather channel 

So what made you happy today?

Day 10: Contests & Blog Sales!

 Image Source Here 

If you check out what I've been reading, you'll notice that a lot of them are actually beauty blogs. I love it when some beauty bloggers go on sale and when some blogs sponsor contests! I just get a rush out of it. I haven't exactly bough anything from blog sales, since I've been trying to tighten my belt a bit, but just the thought that these things are available to you at a rate much less than you would normally get it makes me giddy.

Aren't freebies the most fun? I've hardly won anything ever. But just the same, getting a chance to win is enough for me I guess.

I think I've lived much of my life having to pay for what you get and struggle through just getting the basic things you need to live. This probably explains why I feel like just the thought alone of getting freebies makes me happy. 

And, speaking of contests, check out this contest from Princess Livia.

So what made you happy today?

Day 9: Sweet Fixes

 

The Red Ribbon White Forest Cake

My crazy officemates were successful in "bullying" some of our colleagues to pool some funds to buy this little box of sweetness. I've had this thing of buying a cake for people in the office when I get really angry. It was my way of coping then. It was my effort to remain positive, despite really awful situations. You know how they say that you can counter any negativity by something positive? That's the concept.

The other day though, most the people in our office were extremely sleepy that we couldn't work. So we started kidding each other that one of us should buy a cake. We laughed and passed the responsibility of buying a cake to one another. Until one of our colleagues shouted, "Fine, I will contribute P100 for that cake." And from there, we went around the office so that people could contribute.

We were successful in pooling P620, enough for the Red Ribbon White Forest Cake and the service charges. 

We also took turns in buying ground coffee so that we could all share in a good cup of freshly brewed coffee.

That afternoon, we had a good cup of coffee with our sweet fix. 

:)

So what made you happy today?

Day 8: Boy Friends

There are days where you just feel like you're lucky. Today's one of those days. I've never really had much luck in the romance department. I think most of us go through a series of hits and misses. And even when you are in a good relationship, there are good days and bad days. But (word of warning: I am a closet romantic who just came out) I really believe that when you think you've found it, you ought to be able to fight it out...the disagreements and all.

There should be very few deal breakers. There used to be a long list of things that would make me walk away. To be honest, at this point, I just feel like there are very few things that will fundamentally put a period on a relationship.

Anyway, I don't want to get all mushy. But I do know I am lucky. 

So what's made you happy today?

Day 7: Good Movies

Image Source

When it comes to movie, I have the tendency to look for profound and curiously packaged movies. I do love a good romantic comedy, only because they are fun to watch. While I do enjoy a more intellectually captivating type of film, lately, I have just been looking for films that would make me laugh. Yes. Someone who needs to write a daily blog to remind herself to be happy needs a good laugh every so often.

Over the weekend, I went ahead and watched The Ugly Truth. I laughed my head off. Other favorite laughs include Get Smart and other Steve Carrell films. I do not like slapstick comedies. They don't make me laugh at all.

Anyway, get yourselves good laughs and watch a good comedy. Laughing is probably the easiest way to cheer up.

So what made you happy today?

Day 6: Stuffed Animals

I may be wrinkly and old, but I've never really been without a huggable stuffed animal. For quite some time, I slept with a stuffed bear...now I sleep with a stuffed lion. 

 

Meet Lion. He is a stuffed Lion.

He's so cute and huggable. I bought him a few years ago. He's been with me since. There is comfort in this cute Lion. He makes me happy. Hahaha.

So what made you happy today?

Day 5: Children

I don't have my own kids (yet), but I do have nephews and a niece. I went to see them today. I haven't been feeling very well for pretty much the whole month. I've been going to and fro my doctor to find out what's wrong with me. While I feel much better already, the palpitations I have been having have not completely disappeared. But they are much more tolerable now. My doctor has also assured me that it isn't really serious.

When my niece saw me today, she ran to me, gave me a big, warm hug, and asked: "How are you tita? Are you better na? Does your heart still beat very fast?"

I was surprised and completely touched by the sweetness of my niece. She's 9 years old. She's grown up too fast. I still remember when she still a baby, I used to give her a bath and hold her very cautiously because I was scared that water might frighten her. When I'd make her sleep, she usually had to be carried or she had to sleep on you because that was the only way that she would sleep soundly. She's 9 now.

I am just so glad that she has grown up to be such a caring little girl. 

So what made you happy today?

Day 4: Korean Drama

I love watching Korean Dramas, more than watching Filipino Telenovelas. Korean novelas often have the right amount of humor and drama. Half the time you are laughing, half the time you feel a surge of emotions. I am quite sure that there are heavily dramatic Korean Dramas but I prefer to watch the ones the have quite some humor in them. 

Last night, I slept at about 2:00am, watching You're Beautiful online. It made me laugh so loud. There are some dramas that I actually wait for week after week (thank God we have KBS). Check out Jang Geum Suk aka Tae Kyung and his pouty face. How can you not find that amusing??

Recent favorites include My Fair Lady, Partners, and then of course, You're Beautiful.

All time favorites? It's got to be Kim Sam Soon. Actor? Kim Rae Won.

Haha. Well, I promised myself I'd go to Korea some day. Just because these dramas have made me want to understand and appreciate their country and culture. I wish it wasn't that hard to get a visa though.

What made you happy today?

Day 3: You Tube Gurus

Image Source

I am incredibly into make-up. I'm sure just that will be featured as my happiness pill in the next couple of days. But for now, it's the You Tube gurus. There is such a huge number of beauty bloggers (check out my what I'm reading on the side bar) out there who feature various products and stuff. In the same light, there's such a wide set of options for make-up tutorials online. I love watching them. I've gotten into a routine where i check every morning if any of these gurus have new videos.

My favorites (not that it really matters to any of them, but still, they make me happy.):

1) Pixiwoo: I think I discovered them just a few days ago. But they are absolutely brilliant. They seem rather fond of smokey eyes and high fashion looks but their execution in brilliant! I love how they have done an entire series of classic looks. They are make-up artists by profession and they are also professionally trained. But wow. Plus, they are fun to watch. Sam seems a little more feisty and Nic is just really funny! Haha.

2) Beauty Broadcast: What I particularly love about this guru is the fact that she makes make-up accessible. A lot of the gurus online use very, very expensive brands (MAC, Illamasqua, YSL, Estee Lauder, etc.). Of course almost all of them do special videos for "purely drugstore make-up" looks, but then Emily provides such a wide array of options that are affordable to get the very same look--from the base to the cheeks, to the shadow, liner, and lips. Full-on affordable products. She puts real meaning in affordable beauty.

3) Kandee Johnson: Her costume looks are fantastic! I don't think anyone's Halloween looks were as brilliant as hers. She is also a professional make-up artist. Apart from her skills though, I love that that she brings such positive vibes. She's very cheery and happy that when you watch her videos, you can't help but feel happy too. This girl is truly, truly inspirational. You actually get a feeling that she is, more than just teaching you make up, trying to reach out to you in a very personal way.

I do hope you check them out if you haven't yet. 

So what's made you happy today?

Day 2: Classical Music

 

Image Source

I have been trying to write an article for work for the past two weeks. Haha. I know, it's taking way too long for me to write it. I usually work with my earphones on, listening to music, especially when I need to focus. Depending on my mood, the music I listen too would vary. If I am angry, it's got to be hard core rock. If I feel like my usual self, it's usually pop, with a sprinkle here and there of some alternative. 

But lately, I have lost my inclination to listen to much music, mainly because it was beginning to seem like noise to me. I had to learn to focus differently. It was successful for the most part. But when I need to think, like for writing an article, having noise around doesn't really help. The only think that has helped me so far is Classical Music.

I didn't think I would ever like classical music. My brother used to play it often on car trips and I hated it because it made me sleepy. The effect of the same music today is quite the opposite. Classical music quiets all the noise around, allows me to breath deeply and engage my mind.

For someone new to classical music, try listening to Claude Debussy's Claire de Lune, Rachmaninov's Piano Concerto No. 2 in C Minor, Op. 18 (I think this piece was the inspiration for the more common song "All By Myself". I don't know who the original singer was but I know Celine Dion has a version of this pop hit.), J.S. Bach's Air on the G String. Try listening to them when you feel lost and almost completely dispersed. I promise you it will make a difference. 

So what made you happy today?

Day 1: Fresh Linen

I changed my bed linens on Monday morning. My aunt had sent us a pack new sheets and this was the first time I was going to use these sheets: They are pure white sheets.

I hardly ever use white sheets...mainly because they are just far more expensive than just ordinary printed ones and also because white sheets get dirty easily.

But when I got home that night, looking at my fresh white sheets made me smile. For some reason, they bring forward thoughts of a cozy and comfortable home. Plus, the smell is just divine. It just feels very relaxing.

I feel like white sheets bring some form of peace (to me) and induces relaxation: the two things that I feel I need in my life right now.

What made you happy today?

Image courtesy of Purple & Fine Linen